Surprise Her at Work

It’s one thing to make her feel special when it’s just the two of you, but there’s nothing quite like making her feel special in front of other people. A special delivery at the office would make all her co-workers jealous, and giver her a real boost to start off the week.

I’ve found, however, that paying for flower or other deliveries can be a bit expensive. I don’t know about you, but my budget for romantic ideas is much more limited than I’d like it to be. So, since I can’t afford limousines and weekend getaways, I look for other ways to get the same effect, without the same expense.

Day 30 – Once again, we’re back to flowers. Don’t worry; she isn’t going to get tired of them. I thought about suggesting some other gift for this idea, but the great thing about flowers is that they’ll be real obvious sitting there on her desk. All her co-workers will see them, and of course comment on them.

Do you have a friend or family member you can trust to help you out on this? Get them to be your delivery boy. This works out especially well if they work near your wife. It’s important that her co-workers, and especially the receptionist doesn’t know that person.

So, pick her up some flowers, put them in a vase, and be sure to put a card with it. Her name needs to go on the envelope, and if you know it, it would help to put her department on there too. For fun, you might want to sing the card “from a not-so-secret admirer.” Have your friend deliver it, and your wife will have a very special day.

The Royal Bath

Everyone likes to be treated like they are something special, especially when they are treated that way by someone who is special to them. Since that’s what romance is about, it seems to me like we’ve got a perfect match.

It’s the weekend, and time to relax, right? Well, okay, yeah, there’s the yard to mow, and the car to wash, and all that, but somewhere in all this, we need to find a few minutes to relax as well. Better yet, we need to make sure we find a way to help our wives relax on the weekend. Well, today’s romantic act, one of my favorites, aught to help with that.

Day 29 – Several centuries ago, the Japanese came across the idea that a hot bath was one of the great ways to relax. I’m not sure when we in the “Western World” caught up with this idea, but the idea hasn’t changed in all that time; nor has the effectiveness of that hot bath.

So, let’s make this a really special hot bath for our wives. First of all, stop at the grocery store and pick up a dozen carnations, or other flowers. Don’t let your wife see them, but have them easily at hand for when you prepare her bath. As far as the bath itself, put some perfume and bubble bath in the water as you draw it. I don’t know what it is about bubble bath, but women like it, so we may as well take advantage of it. Cut the stems off of your flowers, and leave them floating in the water.

Just a couple more ingredients are needed to make this the perfect bath. Grab a CD player and you wife’s favorite soft, relaxing music. Put it on in the bath, and invite her in to relax in her special tub. Once she’s in there, bring her an ice cream Sunday.

You got all that? This is a little more complicated than our typical romantic act, but it’s Saturday, you’ve got the time to do something special for her. Not only will the ice cream melt in the hot tub, but I’ll bet her heart will too.

They’re Playing Our Song

Did you ever have a song that the two of you called “our song?” You know, a song that was special because you heard it on your first date, or the first song you danced to, or maybe even a song that just spoke to the two of you about you.

Through the years, sometimes these songs get forgotten about; but they’re still there. I mean, not only does the song still exist, but it’s still in your hearts as well. Music, especially music that we can identify with in some special way is something that never goes away, and can still awaken the same emotions that it did years earlier.

Day 28 – If you don’t have a copy of “your song” anymore, get online and find one to download. Then, sometime when she’s least expecting it, like the moment she collapses on the couch after a long day, play “your song” for her.

It would help if you could enter dramatically into the room with a rose in your teeth, or at least in your hand, about 10 seconds after the song starts (in other words, just long enough for her to recognize it). This would be a good time for a nice long hug, or a slow dance together in the middle of the living room. Don’t worry about the kids giggling, they need to see that you love one another.

Footrub Time

Have you ever wondered how women put up with wearing high heels? I don’t know about you, but to me, it seems like they’d be awfully uncomfortable. Not only that, but I have yet to see a pair of women’s shoes, or at least somewhat stylish women’s shoes that has any padding worth talking about.

I remember back when my eldest daughter worked in a clothing store in the mall. She tried to tell me that her high heels were more comfortable to stand around in all day than some flats. Fortunately for me, I didn’t believe her. Now that she’s a teacher, she still wears the heels, but at least she admits that they’re uncomfortable. I guess that cold be called progress.

Day 27 - A couple of weeks ago, the blog posting talked about giving your wife a backrub. While I’m sure she enjoyed it, that probably isn’t the only part of her body that hurts from time to time. This time, why don’t we go for a footrub. This would probably be especially appreciated on one of those days that she chose to wear high heels.

One very important bit of advice I need to give you about footrubs. Many people have ticklish feet. You aren’t trying to tickle her feet, but to rub them. This is the one time that a soft touch will not be appreciated. Mostly work on the sole of her foot, especially the ball and arch, as those are the parts that are going to hurt the most. 

Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut

Remember the old saying, “you only hurt the ones you love”? Unfortunately, it’s quite true; but the question is, “Why is it so true?” Why should it be that we take things our on those who are closest to us, hurting them for things that really have nothing to do with them?

All too often, we get home from a hard day at work, possibly an argument with the boss, or an altercation with another co-worker. Or, a crisis arises in our family, possibly one of the children getting hurt, doing something foolish. Maybe, we’re dealing with financial struggles caused by the loss of a job. All of these things are part of life; no matter who we are, or what our status and position, we’ll still have problems. But, how we deal with them shows our growth and maturity.

The most common reaction in these situations is to strike out at somebody; that’s how we end up hurting those who are close to us. Instead of striking out at those who have hurt us, or caused us the problem, we strike out at our families.

I have learned through long and hard experience, that there are times that it is best that I not say anything at all. Even trying to say simple things like “pass the salt,” or, “hello” can come out bad when one is confronted with a crisis, or even worse when one is mad. My wife has learned that when I refuse to talk, it is with good reason, and allows me to keep my peace.

Don’t take me wrong on this, I’m not giving you license to give your wife the cold shoulder, or to ignore her in any way. What I’m saying is that I have learned to keep quiet, until and only until I am sure that I can talk without being destructive; talking positive instead of negative.

Day 26 – So, I’m sure you can guess what today’s romantic act is. Yes, I know, this is another one of those cases where it really doesn’t seem romantic; and I’d have to say it really isn’t. But, on the other hand, letting loose all those negative feelings at your wife is definitely the opposite of romantic.

Learn how to get yourself, especially your negative emotions, under control, before you get home to your wife. If that means you take a couple of extra laps around the neighborhood, before pulling into the driveway, do just that.

A little secret that might help you out. The quicker you can forgive those who have spitefully used you, the quicker you can get over it. I’m not saying that you have to forgive them to their face, nor am I saying that you have to say they were right. You’re not forgiving them for their sake, but for your own. There, in the privacy of your car, just say the words, I forgive them.” You’d be amazed how freeing those three words can be.

Regain Your Youth

Why is it, that as we grow older, we start to act like old folks? Oh, I understand, there are certain physical limitations that can come with age, but I’m not talking about that, I’m talking about acting like something is beneath us to do, because we are now adults.

Someone once said that the greatest thing about having grandkids is that you get to get on the floor and play like a kid again. Hooray for the grandkids! Too bad we need them to throw off our stuffiness, and have some good old fun. Maybe, just maybe, it would be possible to have that fun, without having the grandkids; maybe we could do it as a couple.

C’mon, get over your stuffiness, play again, have fun, If anyone looks at your strange, maybe it’s because they don’t have the guts to do what you are doing. Anyway, who cares what they are thinking.

Day 25 – Let’s have some good old fashioned kid type fun. It’s fall, and what does fall bring us? Hmmm, how about all those leaves that have fallen from the trees. Now, if we were kids, what would we do with all those leaves? You got it, we’d rake them into the biggest mountain we could, and jump in it.

So, take off your coat and tie, grab the rake, and make a pile of leaves. Once you’ve got everything ready, grab your wife, bring her outside, and have fun! Make the going outside a game too. Cover her eyes with your hands as you lead her outside.

It may not seem like the most romantic thing you’ve ever done, but it will make the two of you feel young again. If there’s anything that’s romantic, feeling young would have to be pretty high up on the list. 

“Thank You, Honey”

Quite often, it’s the little things that make a big difference. When we do them, everything works out fine, but when we forget them, everything turns into a disaster. Take checking the oil and water in your car for an example. If you keep the oil changed, and the water topped off, your engine will last a long time. But, forget to change the oil regularly, and that car you paid so much for can end up in the junkyard. I know, I’ve made that mistake.

Your wife doesn’t have a dipstick to check her emotional state; but you should be able to have a pretty good idea of it just by watching her. Remember, you are supposed to be the expert on her. Just as checking the oil can seem like a small thing, checking your wife’s emotions is a small thing; but one with great importance.

Much of the time, if our wives emotional state starts getting a little low, it is because of our words. Now, I realize that we, as husbands, are not the only thing that can affect our wife’s emotions, but we’re definitely at the top of the list. Not only that, but we are the ones who have the greatest possibility to turn it around again.

As I said, it’s the little things that make a difference. In other words, it’s the little words that we say, or don’t say that can make the biggest difference for her. Little words like, “Thank you, Honey.” How often do you say that? Or, are you like many men, who take their wife’s work for granted?

Day 24 – Time to form a new habit, the habit of saying “thank you” to your wife. Start out by taking her aside, maybe after dinner, without the kids, and telling her, “I’ve been remiss in not thanking you for everything you do for me. I just want you to know that I appreciate you.”

Don’t let it stop there, though. Make sure you thank her for at least one thing every day (better if you can do more). If necessary, make a note in your cell phone, or planner to remind you to thank her. They say it takes 40 days to form a new habit; so make sure you put it in your planner every day for the next 40 days.