Tuesday, September 4, 2012
Your Gold Plated Word
Let me ask you a question. When you tell your wife that you’re going to do something, what does that mean? I’m not asking what it should mean, but what it really means. Can she take that statement to the bank, knowing that you’ll do what you said? Or, are you like many men, saying things to your wife to get her to be quiet, but not doing what you said you’ll do?
Now, look at it from her perspective. Would she say that you complete what you say you’ll do? Or, would she be a bit skeptical about that? You know, in most couples, what he thinks about the faithfulness of his word and what she thinks are totally different.
It’s really just a matter of perspective. When you and I don’t manage to do something that we said we’d do, we’re usually pretty quick to forgive ourselves. We tell ourselves things like, “It’s just this once” so that we don’t feel bad about it. Since it’s just once, and not a habit, it’s really not that big a deal; so we can forget about it.
But, that same event which we forgave ourselves for might be a really big deal to our wives. In her eyes, that one time we didn’t come through can even overshadow a whole bunch of times that we did; especially if it’s something important to her.
That happens many more times than you’d believe. You see, what’s important to her may not be important to you. So, it’s easy to tell yourself that it’s no big deal, because to you it isn’t. But, that thing that’s not a big deal to you might be a really big deal to her. Let me try and put it in a way that will make sense to you.
Let’s say that you and your wife don’t make love for two weeks. Now, to you that’s a big deal, but to her it’s not. She probably doesn’t even realize that it’s been two whole weeks; while you’re counting the number of hours.
Okay, now let’s reverse that. Let’s say that you promise your wife that you’re going out to eat on Friday. But, at 4:50 in the afternoon, just as you’re getting ready to leave, your boss tells you that you’re going to have to take a client out for dinner. “Okay.” you think, “ No big deal. I can reschedule with my wife.” Whoa! It might not be a big deal to you, but you’ve just allowed your boss to make a liar out of you in your wife’s eyes.
The thing is, a woman needs to be able to trust in her husband’s word. When he says something, she’s got to be able to take it as being gold plated. If she can’t, then she can’t trust her husband. That’s a big deal. Amongst other problems that causes, it causes her huge problems in being able to give herself to him. Like I said, it’s a big deal.
So, make sure that your word is that famous gold plated one. When you tell her something; that should be it. She’s able to have confidence in that word and run with it; knowing that you’ll come through.