Thursday, October 4, 2012

Notice Her!

When was the last time you tool a good look at your wife? I mean a really good look. Can you close your eyes and see her face? Do you know what color her eyes are? Can you describe her hair style? Do you know her favorite clothing colors and styles?

It’s awfully easy to get to the point where your wife just kind of fades into the background; especially if you’re not focused on her. It’s almost as if she becomes part of the furniture. But, she’s not furniture, she’s the most important person in your life.

Now, if you’re reading this blog, I’m sure that you think of her that way, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re aware of everything that’s going on with her. Many changes in life happen slowly enough that they aren’t easy to notice; especially some of the changes that we most want others to see. Take weight loss, for example. That’s a slow process, but who doesn’t like to hear somebody tell them, “It looks like you’ve lost some weight.”

Women do things to change their looks all the time. They change their hair, change their makeup and change their clothing style. The question is “Do we notice?” Unfortunately, most of the time, our answer is “No.”

Okay, so why is that an issue? First of all, pretty much all women are insecure about their looks. They want to be beautiful, but don’t think they are. Even the world’s most beautiful women look at others and wish that they looked like “that” (whatever that is). How much more for a woman who isn’t a supermodel?

In addition to that, a woman who isn’t complimented by her husband feels unfulfilled. Words of Affirmation are supposed to be one of the Five Love Languages. Personally, I think it’s a love language that all women need to hear. So, when we don’t give them those words, we’re not affirming them. Instead of making them feel good, it’s as if we’re sending the message, “You and what you do, aren’t important.”

Finally, noticing her and how she looks, especially the good parts, is going to help you stay in love with her. Hey, we’re visual. So we need to make sure we’re seeing the right things, especially that we’re seeing the right woman. We don’t need to be looking at the other ones.

When she changes her hair, notice it; say something about it. Likewise when she’s got a new dress on. Don’t ask how much it cost, comment about how she looks, and make sure that the comments are positive. She needs that affirmation. She needs to know that she still catches your eye. She needs to know that when you look at her, you see a beautiful woman, whom you’re glad you married. 


  1. sage advice! and so important...

  2. Amen!!! The best way to reassure her too is for a husband to make sure that if he isn't complimenting his own wife, he's not complimenting other women.