Sunday, April 1, 2012

Ignore Her, Maybe She’ll go Away


We’ve been talking about romance for over a year now, but for some of you, it just doesn’t seem to be working. You know, there are just some women who don’t respond, no matter what you do. I don’t know if it’s that they’re romantically deaf, don’t care or that their heart, like the Grinch’s is just three sizes too small.

Whatever it is, the poor guys who married these women are in a world of hurt. They’re the ones whose wives are convinced that whatever they do is wrong. In fact, I just recently saw a T-shirt that speaks of this. It said, “If a man talks in the woods, and there are no women around to hear him, is he still wrong?” What can I say?

While most women are fairly quick to respond to romance, there are always those few who have read the playbook, know what we are going to do and have already dismissed it. To them, it doesn’t matter how romantic the act is, it’s not new, so they don’t care.

I can see only one final solution to these cases, ignore her, maybe she’ll go away. Just think, at least you won’t have anyone nagging at you and telling you that you’re wrong. Peace and quiet, just like you’ve dreamed of it. You can watch the ball game without anyone telling you to go cut the grass. You can leave all your dirty clothes on the floor and nobody will care. Why, you could even have all night card games with the guys and nobody would be the wiser.

Okay, you’ll lose a few things as well; but, so what? Isn’t peace in your home worth it? Isn’t it worth it, so that you can be your own boss once again? You’ve looked with jealousy at the guys who are single, wishing you were amongst their number, so why not rejoin them?

Now, it might take a while to convince her that your ignoring her is serious, but stick to your guns. You’ve had an excellent teacher… her. So, just do unto her as she’s done to you. Eventually she’ll get the message. But remember, slip up once and you’ll have to start the clock over once again.

P.S. For those of you who think I’m serious, just remember what day it is.

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