Wednesday, February 8, 2012
More Than Ever Before
Do you remember your dating days? You know, that time when the two of you were just having fun together, enjoying being together, talking together; enjoying each other’s touch. What ever happened to those days? How did we lose those great feelings that drove us to being together?
The answer to those questions is really rather simple; reality raised up its ugly head to bite us. That’s right, the culprit for losing those wonderful feelings of being in love is reality. You see, when we’re dating, there’s really no reality involved. It’s all a dream world. Everything is like living in a fairy tale, where they live happily ever after.
Then, once we get married, we find out that there are bills to pay, that she doesn’t wake up in the morning, looking like she stepped off a magazine cover and problems to deal with. All of a sudden, those wonderful feelings vanish, like a puff of smoke.
Actually, those feelings don’t vanish, they just get covered up by dealing with reality. We don’t stop loving our wives. We don’t stop wanting to be with them. We don’t stop wanting to touch them. We just get so busy dealing with reality, that we don’t have enough time for the things which were so important when we were dating. Then when kids come along, it gets even worse.
Have you ever felt like your wife doesn’t love you as much as she did before? If you’re like most of us, you probably have, more than once. Well, guess what, she feels the same way. She wonders if you love her. She looks back to those dating days, remembering how the two of you were (and she remembers it much better than you do), and wonders what happened to make you fall out of love with her.
Now, I’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt here; I’m pretty sure you love her as much as you did then, or even more. Otherwise, I really doubt you’d be reading this blog. So, what went wrong?
What’s gone wrong is the expression of love (or lack thereof). Here comes reality again, to give us another bite. Because of dealing with all the problems and whatever of life, we stop spending so much time expressing our love and spend more and more time expressing our problems. That’s nowhere near as interesting for either of you; but, it’s necessary.
This is why it’s so important to tell your wife that you love her. She hears so much negativity out of your mouth that she needs to hear something positive; specifically something positive about your relationship. That means a lot to her.
In fact, don’t just tell her you love her; tell her you love her more than ever before. Tell her you love her more than the day you were married. Tell her that every year you love her more. She feels like you don’t love her as much as before, so destroy that negative thought with a positive one. Give her the message that your love hasn’t diminished, but instead has grown as you’ve come to know her more.