Thursday, May 5, 2011
Show Your Appreciation
Everyone likes to be appreciated; you like it, I like it, and I’m sure your wife likes it too. If fact, she probably likes it so much that she wants more of it, especially if you’ve fallen into the habit that many of us do, of not showing your appreciation to your wife.
It’s very easy to get to the point where we are taking the things around us for granted; that can include the most important people in our lives as well. We can become so used to the things that they do for us, that we forget that there’s a real person taking their time and energy to do that thing. It might be something where we’d say “thank you” to anyone else in the world that did it; but because it’s our wife, we forget. Ouch!
Let me ask you something, how would you feel if you spent Saturday afternoon working through the famous honey-do list, and when you got done, all your wife did was grunt at you? Wouldn’t you feel that her reaction was unfair or just plain wrong? Well, why should she feel any different?
I remember hearing a preacher tell about something he did, when he was learning this principle. His wife had made some nice hot soup for dinner. When he was done eating, he placed a dollar under his plate and got up to go to the living room. A few minutes later his wife walked in the living room with the dollar in her hand and asked, “What’s this?” He responded, “When I receive good service in a restaurant, I leave a tip to show my appreciation. You made me some wonderful soup and it was hot; I like my soup hot. I wanted to show you that I appreciate your work.”
I’m not suggesting that you get in the habit of leaving your wife a tip every time she does something for you; she’s not a servant, she’s your wife. However, that preacher obviously managed to get his message across to his wife, the message that he appreciated what she did for him.
Maybe the next time you buy flowers for your wife, you should put on the card, “Because I appreciate you.” Or, you could text her that message, or even send her a greeting card, with those words written inside. Somehow or other, you need to find a way to get in the habit of telling your wife that you appreciate her and what she does for you.
When we forget to show appreciation for something that has been done for us, we send the message, “You aren’t important to me.” Wait a minute! Isn’t that the opposite message that we’re trying to send with romance? Aren’t we trying to send the message, “You’re important to me”? So, if we consider that we get one point every time we send the romance message, then we have to realize that we lose one point every time we forget to say, “thank you.” No wonder some of us are running our love account in bankruptcy.
Maybe it feels a little bit strange to you to tell your wife “thank you” because she fixes dinner every day. So what? This isn’t supposed to be about how you feel, but about how you make her feel. If you feel a little bit uncomfortable about saying “thank you” I’ve got a word of advice for you; be a man, get over it.