Sunday, December 5, 2010
Start in the Kitchen
There was a book written a number of years ago, that I never read, but I’ve always liked the title and the concept of this book. I can’t remember the exact title right now, because I’m used to talking about it in Spanish; but it went something like, “Begin in the Kitchen.” The idea was that lovemaking doesn’t begin in the bedroom, but in the kitchen.
I’m not saying that a couple should make love in the kitchen; although if the kids are away, and the curtains are closed, and that’s what you want to do, go for it. No, the idea is that the things we do outside the bedroom are the preparation for what we do in the bedroom.
Day 47 – How many opportunities do we miss in the average day to have some sort of expression of love? At times, even though we live in the same house, we live as strangers, all but ignoring each other. Well, today we are going to change that.
One of the most common ways of expressing love is thought touch. I’m not talking about sexual touch right now, just touch. Many women complain that the only time their husbands touch them is when it’s sexual. That shouldn’t be. Women’s skin is more sensitive than a man’s, so they are naturally receptive to and affected by touch.
A light touch is the thing that works best; so light, that it’s like a feather. My wife loves it when I touch the back of her neck like this. She also loves it when I touch her back and legs the same way, although there’s usually clothing in the way of that. But, for her, the back of the neck is the place.
Since we have our office in the home, I have lots of opportunities throughout the day to walk past my wife’s desk while she is working; or if not there, then in the kitchen. I need to get up about once an hour to walk around for a moment, and I almost always use the opportunity to pass by where she is, touch the back of her neck, or possibly kiss her there, and go on to whatever I was going to do.
I also take advantage of the opportunities that present themselves to hug her. We typically pass each other by a couple of times per day. If at all possible (such as our hands aren’t full of stuff) I take the opportunity for a spontaneous hug.
The point is to make a habit of touching your wife in a loving, non-sexual way. Each and every time you do that, you are transmitting love to her; maybe not verbally, but just the same, the message can get through.